mafiadotorgfandomcom-20200213-history
Mafia Gazette Past Issue 114
The Mafia Gazette Issue 114 For All The News That Is News (E&OE) Sunday 10th December 'SERIAL KILLER RAMPAGES ON ' By John Milton Not since the days of Jack the Ripper in old London town has a nation seen such a feared and notorious killer as the individual we know only as The Ammo Man. He lures unsuspecting victims into a seedy alleyway, with promises of cheap bullets or guns, and slays them mercilessly. His rampage of terror is showing no signs of letting up, with both citizens and mobsters alike falling prey to him. Despite the numerous amounts of people who have actually survived attacks from this menace, there has still been no solid evidence to point to any one suspect, without even a vague description being given by most survivors. With such an astounding lack of evidence considering the multitude of deaths and injuries reported from this attacker, red-faced Police officials are keeping fairly tight-lipped, although they have asked The Gazette to remind its readers that the purchasing of weapons and ammunition in such a manner as The Ammo Man offers is highly illegal, and will result in prosecution if any evidence of it is gathered. The seemingly random and indiscriminate attacks have not been limited to those of lesser influence in our nation, with family heads and influential citizens alike amongst the list of victims. With so little known about this killer, The Gazette can only urge its readers to think twice before entering dark alleys with strange men, little good can come of it. 'NEW YORK IN NUDE MAFIA SHOCK ' By Zinglebert Humptyback Citizens of New York were in for a shock Friday night, as they were accosted by the unsightly forms of both Quentin and Jameson, nude as the day they were born. The normally dapper and well presented pair were seen running naked around several districts of the city, and an elderly lady was hospitalised in Little Italy after she fainted with shock. It is not known why the pair of well-known mafiosi were streaking around the city, though several sources say they may have lost a bet, or been dared by a friend. Neither party could be contacted for an interview on the matter, perhaps they are too busy shopping for new outfits… 'SEASONAL GOODWILL NEEDED ' By John Milton Christmas is a time of year to spend with family and loved ones, a time for giving and receiving, and a time of general happiness. However this is not the case for some, a small minority must endure Christmas cold, alone, and hungry, starved just as much of affection as food. We at The Gazette would like our readers to spare a thought for the less privileged amongst us, to those less fortunate than ourselves. Soup kitchens are being set up around the cities for the homeless and hungry, and many people have been sending in donations to us to be passed on to those who normally would not be able to afford Christmas. So in the spirit of the season of goodwill, I would like to ask readers to give what they can, and help bring a smile to someone’s face this Christmas. Help those who need it most. 'A STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION ' By The_Plague Recently we've seen a turn in the right direction for the leaders of our community. It all began at a street corner in Chicago, at about half past six on the 30th of November. The Midnight Society leader, Bell, came to the streets announcing her family’s relocation from New York to none other then the grand city of Chicago. Chicago had been up for grabs after the leave of Tanzini and Bell proved to be quickest to the snatch. Her speech was well received by some of the leading figures of our society, with many highly ranked faces showing up to congratulate her on her new Chicago Headquarters. No more then 1 and a half hours later, Jameson addressed the nation from New York, as spokesperson of infamous Conceptualists. A charismatic, confident speech was given to the nation, followed by a cheer of relief by the New York residents, finally able to rid their fine city of the muggers and scum that infested it. Even ASDA showed up to applaud the effort with an appearance by none other then Clamps himself, only days before his death. Clamps' exact words stating that he 'applauds such an act' before addressing his concern that the lockdown be taken into better organizational hands then the last one, that resulted in many people dying without a word of caution or warning. Finally, on the very day a speech was produced stating the LACK of leader presence in the community, none other then Mr. Albert Neri stepped out onto the streets with his usual assortment of bodyguards. He gave the community insight into his family’s plans for Atlanta, revealing that the family intends to structure the cities bar owners via sanctioned and unsanctioned. He finished off by stating the construction of what will become one of the finest hotels in America, The Atlanta Imperial Ambassador Hotel, where all business about Atlanta will be handled. ASDA and TUQ are still in the shadows about their intentions but with speakers like T1fa and Lithium leading the way, we can only suspect it's soon to come. 'CLASSIFIEDS ' By John Milton Staff wanted! The Mafia Gazette is still looking for both regular columnists and one-off articles. Got a juicy bit of info? Drop me a line, if it makes it into a story there could be money in it for you. The news doesn’t tell itself, we need to support of good writers and good sources of information. Contact John Milton for further info. Fight Night… On Monday night Tomson and Sybor will square off in a fight, without weapons, until one of them gets knocked out. This fight is not only organised for your entertainment, no it's not. You will also be able to bet on the fight, the maximum bet is $10.000 and the minimum bet is $1000. All money needs to be transferred to Lady_Naomi with an attachment on who they want to bet. Tomson and Sybor have fought each other twice and both have a win over each other, on Monday we will all know who is the very best!